Joining the Five Minute Friday community of bloggers with a one word prompt. 


How could God leave me alone with this pain?

At first I felt God’s nearness.

The first few months after our daughter’s death I relied on His presence.

I sought comfort in His Word, found solace in the words of David.

His suffering and pain matched mine.MorningMist

And then, the busyness of work, going back to school, writing a dissertation crowded out my time alone with my Father.

It was painful to go to church.

Songs leaked memories into my heart.

Concerned brothers and sisters wanted to give me comfort with hugs.

Hugs made me leak tears.

Special Days at church brought more tears.

And then, I could not feel God’s presence.

I became angry with Him.

His promises did not ring true.

I was alone.

But He did not leave me alone.

He just waited for me.

Slowly, gradually, I felt His waiting.MorningPath

I walked in shadows, but He waited in sunlight.

Praise to Yahweh, the Healer.

He touched the wounds in my broken heart.

Finally, walking in His light,

I am healed.

Today’s topic reminds me to be thankful for God’s faithfulness during my long road of grief. Grief is never really over. As Kate Motaung says it’s a cyclical journey.





4 thoughts on “ALONE

  1. Carly

    Hi, I’m your FMF neighbour. Your post is beautiful- we went along similar lines with the word “alone” and I relate a lot (different circumstances but similar feelings). So grateful that God never leaves us alone and that he draws us out of the shadows to walk in his light and brings healing to our broken places.

  2. Carrie

    Thanks for sharing that Martell. I so admire and love you. My pain.. and we all have pains… can not be compared in any way to yours. Yet, I have felt alone… so alone at times… “But He did not leave me alone.”.


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